One Hand

after a visit to Chilliwack General Hospitals' new ER....
oh ya with a pretty thumb ;) August 26th

after a visit to the OR in Royal Columbian Hospital September 1st

the fancy new splint... made just for me.... post-op at
Royal Columbian once again. Sept 9

tadaa.... its healing and am all stitched up!! physio in the happening- during
redressing at the post-op check-up.

Wow… it seems like forever since I’ve had a look at my blog, and I suppose there’s not been a whole lot new happening, so I forget about it too! Well 2 weeks ago tomorrow I had a small accident while helping out a friend. As I was putting some glass jars away they shattered slicing open my right hand thumb, severing the tendon and therefore surgery was in order to repair the tendon. As I went in for surgery last week Wednesday, Dr. Perey explained that he was going to cut into my hand to retrieve the tendon as it had retracted after 6 days of waiting.

In I went, as they surgical team prepped me for surgery we chatted; on went heart monitors, in with the IV, and on with 100% oxygen, some medicine in the IV line and I was out within seconds, praying all would go well as I drifted off in the cold Operating Room, covered with heated blankets.

I was not afraid of the surgical procedure, but the waking up from anesthesia was frightening, having had 2 not so good experiences with it in previous years. I woke up, immediately realizing I was fully awake, and not drifting in and out, hearing but not being able to respond; I was there and with a thankful heart silently gave thanks to God for another answered prayer! It wasn’t long before I was hauled- yes literally on my narrow stretcher into the elevator heading down to Ambulatory Care where mom had been anxiously waiting for me. I was left there under the fabulous care of the nurses until I was ready to get up and go home an hour later.

Surgery took an hour and after spending 2 hours recovering from the anesthesia I was as hungry as a horse having not eaten all day and it about 5pm when we finally left Royal Columbian Hospital in New Westminster to get stuck in rush hour traffic on the hour and a half drive home- eew!

Well, all is well and now I am getting used to typing with one finger at a time, washing, dressing, driving and everything else with one hand…. Yes I am very thankful it was my right hand as I’m a lefty! Today is a week since surgery and it feels like things are healing up well; most of the muscle spasms and cramping is past and I’m going stir crazy of sitting around not being able to work or use both hands. Days like today can get really discouraging; I am always busy and I have much to do but am challenged to do it all with one hand now. Tonight it finally got to me. I came home after having had an errand day, dinner at friends and my house that has been waiting for a cleaning. The dishes were piling up and I have so much to do and want to do but am unable to do; the tears came. I filled up the sink with soapy water, put on a CD from Michael W. Smith and attempted to wash dishes with one hand near giving up a few times. It was hard, frustrating and I was upset with everything as the tears poured down my tired cheeks. I was going to was these dishes and I did it, though it took a good long while.

I questioned God, and He convicted me right back…the battle was on and I had lost sorely. There was nothing to do but surrender to Him, giving it all back as it was obvious there is no way I could manage things alone with just me in control; let alone a one handed me.

I sat down on my bed paging through my Bible looking for some encouragement. The psalms, my favourite book always was full of encouragement and it seemed that wherever I looked all the verses started with praises and thanksgiving….. more conviction.

Psalm 139 was on my mind having heard my friend Lisa talking about it as we had prepared dinner tonight. As I read through it I knew this was what I needed.

“O Lord, You have searched me and know me.

You know when I sit and when I rise up; You understand my thought from afar.

You scrutinize my path and my lying down, and are intimately acquainted with all my ways.

Even before there was a word on my tongue, behold O Lord You know it all.”

Yes God knew my heart before I did and had planned this all out. Amazing. Than after spending some time reading a bit, I was flipping through my bible some more and got reading the encouragement pieces I had written in the front cover;

“Prayer does not control God; but is a demonstration of our

dependence upon and submission to His plans and purposes”

What an amazing and wonderful God we serve. I was struggling so much; my house and car don’t seem to be selling in my time, than I have an accident and can’t even work…nice I thought, bills don’t just pay for themselves… that alone is discouraging, and now needing to make sure my hand is healed before heading back home to Uganda; everything seemed to be slowing me down and testing me…. I got caught up in a pity-me attitude and God humbled me through showing me how great and majestic His love is. Even when I am feeling so far from Him, He never leaves us; His children. God continues to show me how great my need for Him is; and this humbling evening reminded me that I am so thankful for God sending His Son to die for me; He loved me so much.

As the struggles and joyous times pass through my life it is my constant prayer that God continues to humble me that He would always be exalted; bringing me down to my knees where I belong, submitting to Him.

Two weeks ago everything was looking so good in my life; when it was literally shattered and torn as the glass broke, tearing apart the tendon…. From that moment on so much has changed and God as grown me so much more and closer to Him as I trust in Him every moment of every day to help me to go forward and not alone; never alone but with Him at my side.

Please pray with me that I would only grow stronger and more and more into Christ-likeness as I work through this difficult time; and keep trusting in Him and am open to what He is teaching me through this and the grace to accept whatever He leads me through. For if He brings it to me, He most certainly will bring me through it.